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Greenhouse

by Caitlin Pasko

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1.
I Know I 02:15
When you know a person When you know them It doesn't let you by How do I feel? When I know you 'Cause I do I know I can't trust my emotions Because My skin crawls With what I've always wanted
2.
Unwell 04:50
Today I spent my time Walking around a neighborhood that's not mine Walking is hard When you have to lift your legs, your quadriceps Everyone laughs, everyone laughs as they pass me by My hair blows in my mouth My hand searches for a pocket But I wore the jacket without pockets I think of you In your jean jacket, I feel you Like a black swing in the sun on a playground Like chocolate icecream melting in the street I step off off the sidewalk and try not to fall I wonder if they can tell I'm unwell Everyone laughs, everyone laughs as they pass me by
3.
Even God 05:28
I'm stuck in death Every little loss grows into death I'm stuck in death The big sleep you sleep in Even God is selfish I walk around The yard, the house Has never been This clean before You can sleep in Just make the bed Even God is selfish
4.
You know you are a horrible person I shouldn't have to explain it to you Or tell you why, You should know it already I shouldn't have to give you examples You know you are a horrible person And I could never really by fully At ease around you Like a cat on a hot tin roof Wondering when it should move I know you are a horrible person Please stop texting me on my birthday Or when you hear that I'm having surgery Or when you see that I've moved on After looking me up on Venmo
5.
Ooo Happy 01:48
6.
It's hard to believe that I was ever a peach in the leaves Never thought you'd choose me then leave me in the kitchen a week Never thought I'd be covered in bruises, I thought I was free Free, Can I be? Free It's hard to believe that I was ever that version of me Even though I'll always be dismantling her ideology When he eats the watermelon he'll have to spit out the seeds Free, Can I be? Free, Can I be? From the dirt From the sea To the leaves Back to the leaves Summertime peach Water on the leaves Fully healthy mind A greenhouse grows inside
7.
Mother 03:07
Today I Remembered What it feels like To go walking On a sidewalk In a city That's not my city My mother Never left me Alone Long enough to Get lost Get lost Get lost Today I Thought about how It must feel To give birth And to look In the eyes Of yourself She's my daughter I'm her sister She's my sister I'm her sister I'm her mother I'm her mother She's my mother
8.
You are a lake and You're still as glass And I am me and I am sat Indian Style On a lily pad You are the sun Low in the sky And in my eyes You are a mirror and I'm paralyzed When I think of you I take a shovel to my chest And dig as deep as I can get, I dig as deep as I can get
9.

about

Caitlin Pasko’s songs are rooms where silence and language are granted equal weight. Her singing is precise, but soft and reserved, and her piano-playing drifts and floats like the work of Satie or Debussy, thriving on the tension between dynamics, tempo, and space. Her new LP Greenhouse -- the first to follow 2017’s Glass Period EP -- derives its name from structures that protect plant life from unfavorable external conditions, and from environments in which flora adapt in order to survive and sustain other life forms. Written during and in the wake of an emotionally abusive partnership, Greenhouse documents the dissolution of relationships: from the romantic to the familial; from close friendships to Pasko’s ever-evolving connection to herself. Greenhouse weathers solitude’s storms in the form of sprawling fantasias, peripatetic monologues, and elegiac meditations. It is a musical evocation of a safe space for personal transformation, healing, and unconditional love.

credits

released August 28, 2020

⬆️ 'Greenhouse' T-shirts are available in the merch tab ⬆️

All songs written by Caitlin Pasko

Produced, Mixed, and Mastered by Henry Terepka
Additional Mixing by Vince Chiarito at Hive Mind Recording
Recorded at Pinch Recording in Long Island City, Queens

Piano, Vocals, & Synths
(Dave Smith Tetra, Moog Minitaur)
by Caitlin Pasko

Guitar, Percussion, & Synths
(Dave Smith Tetra, Moog Sub 37, Yamaha TX7)
& Additional Piano on "Horrible Person" & "Mother"
by Henry Terepka

Album Art by Tonje Thilesen
Cassette Layout by Benedict Kupstas

Lyrics to "I Know I" by M.C.B. <3

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Caitlin Pasko Brooklyn, New York

Caitlin Pasko’s songs are rooms where silence and language are granted equal weight. Her singing is precise, but soft and reserved, and her piano-playing drifts and floats like the work of Satie or Debussy, thriving on the tension between dynamics, tempo, and space. ... more

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